This is me trying to take a little bit of control of my own destiny for Mother’s Day. Is that so wrong?

My spouse knows what I want on Mother’s Day to a T, and he does his very best for me: little people are extra friendly; we all eat brunch; he fields the dirty diapers and discipline as much as is humanly possible. maybe there is chocolate. Klaar en klaar.

Beyond the basics, he will often surprise me with a some reward alone time. He takes the kids to the library or park for a few hours and tells me to be happy, relax, and do no work.

But, what must I do? Without any notice, I often end up feeling eradicated from my own family. I sure as heck better come up with something worthy of this precious gift of time!

As a favor to myself (and maybe you), I thought we could brainstorm a few terrific ways to spend that imaginary three hours of selfish indulgence:

Massage. You want a massage on Mother’s Day? You might as well book it now, sweetie. Don’t get kicked out of the house on Sunday morning expecting to find a day spa opening.

Last minute option: Grab your flip flops and try for a walk-in pedicure.

See a movie. I love to see movies alone, but if that’s not your thing, find a pal and book tickets for something girly.

Last minute option: get hold of a smartphone or tablet for a Netflix binge session. I’ve done this in my minivan, but somehow that seems a lot more tragic than festive. maybe you can do it in the corner of a cafe after ordering a mimosa.

Walk or run with a friend. Can you conspire with a girlfriend to get out of the house together? meet at your favorite trail and hike in relative peace.

Last minute option: put on your running shoes and just GO, do not look back!

Brunch, or something like it. High-end places might require reservations on this holiday, but you alone with your book can sit at the counter.

Last minute option: Brunch line still too long? put on a podcast and carry your cronuts to a park bench with a view (preferably not of a playground!).

Uninterrupted reading. get hold of a good book and pick a great place to read — better than your car. I’m reading The kids in the Boat.

Last minute option: Download a new kindle book or find two new magazines to peruse.

In the past, when things don’t go my way on Mother’s Day, it feels like this.

If I manage my expectations and go share some of that love with my own mama, it is a happier day for everyone.

Happy Mother’s Day planning, friends. What’s on your list?